Night Owl vs. Morning Lark: What Your Sleep Style Says About You (and Your Relationships)
Jun 06, 2025Have you ever been told you “just need to wake up earlier” to be more productive or healthy?
Or maybe your partner stays up past midnight while you're out cold by 9PM—and you're left wondering, Why can't we sync up?
Well, here's the truth:
You're not broken. You're not lazy. You’re likely just a different chronotype—and that’s completely normal.
What Is a Chronotype, Anyway?
Your chronotype is your natural biological tendency to sleep and wake at certain times. It's like your internal clock’s personality.
According to sleep researchers like Dr. Michael Breus and Dr. Matthew Walker, our chronotype determines whether we’re wired to be a morning lark, night owl, or somewhere in between. Studies show:
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About 40% of people are morning larks 🐦 (early to bed, early to rise).
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Around 30% are night owls 🦉 (late to bed, late to rise).
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The other 30% fall somewhere in the middle (hello, midday energy warriors!).
And guess what? These tendencies are genetic and deeply rooted in human evolution.
Back in tribal times, it made sense to have people awake during all hours of the night and day to protect the community. While some were up with the sunrise gathering food, others were alert at night, keeping watch.
So if you’re struggling to change your rhythm—maybe your body is telling you something.
Why This Matters for Your Health & Relationships
Let’s get personal for a second.
I’m a proud morning lark. My husband? 100% night owl.
In the early years of our marriage, this mismatch caused tension: different sleep times, different energy levels, and very different ideas of “quality time.”
But understanding our chronotypes changed everything.
We stopped forcing each other into unnatural routines. Instead, we learned to respect each other’s rhythms, make small compromises, and prioritize overlap time.
✨ It brought more peace, more connection, and less guilt.
And when it comes to health? Chronotypes matter more than you think.
Ignoring your natural rhythm can throw off your sleep quality, hormone balance, metabolism, and even mental health. Constantly fighting your body’s clock is like swimming upstream every day.
Signs You’re Ignoring Your Chronotype
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You wake up groggy and can’t shake it for hours.
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You get a second wind late at night (but force yourself to bed early).
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You constantly feel “off” or misaligned with your partner or schedule.
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You rely heavily on caffeine to function.
If this sounds like you—it might be time to listen to your body and adjust your sleep schedule (or at least stop feeling bad about it).
How to Honor Your Chronotype (Without Blowing Up Your Life)
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Track Your Energy Peaks:
Notice when you naturally feel most alert and most sleepy. This is your body talking. -
Communicate With Your Partner:
If you’re mismatched like us, carve out intentional overlap time. Maybe it's breakfast chats or cozy wind-downs before bed. -
Stop Forcing Routines That Don’t Fit You:
Not everyone thrives with a 5AM workout. And that’s okay. -
Optimize Your Sleep Environment:
Regardless of when you sleep, make it deep and restorative—blackout curtains, white noise, magnesium, etc.
Want to Learn More?
Join us for the Sleep Optimization Workshop on June 22nd at The Scented Leaf in Tucson.
Led by Integrative Health Practitioner Adrienne “Nin” Barela, this session will cover:
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How to identify and honor your chronotype
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Real-life strategies for deeper, better sleep
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Hormone-balancing sleep hacks
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And how to sync your rhythms for better energy & connection
